Sometimes My Heart Breaks

HopeSometimes my heart just breaks. It breaks into millions of tiny little pieces scattered all around me as I see a world that so desperately needs hope. I hear the echoing shatter as I watch life grasp hopeless things of this world that can only offer pain and destruction as it leads to addictions and strongholds that destroys lives in a rippling effect that multiplies by the minute.

We turn to things that falsely promise fun, significance, excitement, numbness, satisfaction, or love, but they are broken the moment we are sucked into the very vortex they swirl in. What we really long for is to be captured by someone who loves us unconditionally and that can satisfy every single need that we could ever have.

I know the darkness that my life once existed in, and the light of grace that brought it back to true life, and I long for everyone to know that grace. My healed heart yearns for every hurting and broken heart to know where my healing came from and to be awakened by the hope that awakened my soul.

The hope that my soul has been awakened by has found purpose inside of me, a purpose that my Creator is on the path to fulfil even now. There is a fire that burns within the deepest parts of me that want nothing more than to light the way to Hope, to Jesus Christ. I want every life that I can reach to know there is a promise that we can hold on to and that won’t be broken. The promise of abundant and eternal life through Jesus Christ, the One who laid down His life for ours. Oh how it must break His heart when He sees us chasing after pointless shadows that lead us down a road that literally gives way to a dead-end.

I was a life that knew darkness, and I am a life that knows light. My mission is to make that light shine in every corner of darkness that God leads me to. My desire is to passionately follow Christ so that I can passionately lead others to pursue a love that can be found nowhere else, a love that changes us at the very core of our being, a love that knows no limits, and the only love worth pursuing!

I am a life that has been changed, and I am a life that desires to take that change and use it to make a difference. I want to see hearts walking away from the lies of the enemy and the shattered pieces of broken promises and run to the truth of God’s Word and His promises that are unbreakable!

Yes, sometimes my heart breaks, but it’s through that brokenness that God’s message can be shared in the shattering with hopes that hearts will hear, accept and embrace healing!

Jesus said to her, “Everyone who drinks of this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again. The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.”  John 4:13-14

Hushing the Scream

DSC_0195We are our own worse critics….Those words echo in my mind and in the depths of my soul day after day. Every step I take forward I feel as if my flaws and imperfections knock me three back. “God, how can you possibly use someone like me to do what you’re asking me to do?” is the question that begs for me to entertain it every single time it boomerangs back at me.

I am a very flawed human being that has surface scratches that lead to deeper wounds that reveal every scar. I have quirks and I mess up, I trip and I fall short. But every time these thoughts raid my mind, the Holy Spirit intervenes and reminds me that we all fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23).

The enemy wants us to believe that we have to be perfect in order to be used by God for anything that could build His Kingdom, but why wouldn’t he want us to think that! He knows that we don’t have to be, in fact, he knows that God uses the imperfect and flawed, but he doesn’t want us to believe that, so he lies to us! None of us are perfect, that’s fact, and when we step out in faith believing that fact and decide to follow God wherever He is leading us, the enemy knows that God’s Kingdom is about to be impacted and his isn’t.

We will always see our own flaws in magnification and view our own shortfalls as deep dives, because we really are our own worse critics. When my flaws scream to overshadow God’s truth in my life, I have to hit pause, rewind, and let God’s truths overshadow the screams of my flaws. God doesn’t ask us to be perfect, He just wants a willing, available, and surrendered heart. He takes care of the rest! He didn’t send His one and only Son to the cross to die for everyone’s sins but mine, He sent Him once for All.

Whatever surface scratches and deep wounds we may have, the blood of Christ fills and heals! The lies of the enemy telling us that we’re not worthy or suited for what God is asking us to do is just that, lies! We can choose what voice we listen to but whatever voice we entertain will be the voice we hear the loudest. The shouts of the enemy are no match for the still, small voice of God when we have hidden His word in our hearts. Those deep truths that we tuck away in our hearts will bubble to the surface in the blink of an eye! We can speak just as Jesus spoke in the garden when He spoke the truths of His Father out loud when the enemy came to tempt Him. That’s the power of Christ in us!

I am grateful for every flaw, every wound, and every scar. I am eternally grateful that God doesn’t desire perfection because I want to collide with Him to make an impact for His Kingdom, and I am millions of miles away from being anything near perfect. I can’t do what He’s asking me to do on my own, and that’s His plan! It’s only through Him and with Him that I can do anything!

Whatever God is asking of you today, hold tight to His truths and remind yourself that you can do all things through Christ who strengthens you. God never asked you because He expects you to be perfect, He asked you because He knows what you can do because He created and designed you perfectly, for His will! It’s those very flaws and scars that make you chosen and called because God uses those to reach out to others and draw them closer to Him! All things, yes even our flaws, God works together for good and His glory!

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28